my visit to the apothecary

...and so I went because I needed a good fixing.

The next morning, I was gifted with a heavy head and a lighter heart.

Three different people in my landscape pointed out something - prolly my one trait which always manages to bring me to this place. I am too much of a hopeful. I refuse to see things as they are. In return, frustration takes a huge bite out of me when I don't see things fall where I want them to. I like making my own design, but it always seems that I am swimming upstream in their execution.

I once heard a saying that it's okay to fall in with the rest of the pack... follow the path, the movement, and accept the pace. But this is not me... I like to trace my own path and leave a trail behind.

I am sooooo frustrated because I only wanted one thing: to pull a goddamn bunny out of the top hat. And I believed in it so much that it hurt when something else came out of it.

Because of the fact that I am rebellious by nature, I must learn to relish the taste of my own tears.