Separating from Sebastian

One glorious epiphany landed and perched on my head this evening as I was winding things down at work. It was brought about by a conversation about phone lines amongst my boss, my co-workers and myself. The question was, "Do you have a home phone number?". Some people in the kitchen have no home phones - it's an extra bill to pay and with the unlimited minutes that some phone companies offer, a mobile phone can substitute very well for a landline. Most of us have both a land line and a mobile. I rarely use my home phone though... and most of the calls I get there are screened carefully. But one guy, on the other hand, had no mobile.

My coworkers and I were shocked at this admittance. Nowadays, it's an absolute neccessity to carry a cell phone - be it for emergencies, booty calls, email, chat, notekeeping, etc etc. A cell number is a direct line to a person. If you wanted to speak to someone and that particular person is not in front of you, it's easy to drop down to your contacts and, voila! You're connected. Communication is convenient and easy.

I questioned my colleague's peculiar choice of not having a mobile. He answered: "What's it going to be for? If I'm not at home, I'm at work. If I'm at work, then I wouldn't be able to talk. And if I'm not at any of those two places, I probably don't want to take any calls anyway.". And that is where the epiphany hit me.

I have an iPhone (Sebastian, from Cruel Intentions) that I can't live without. I once joked and said that if I could surgically implant my phone to my arm, I would. That is how much time I spend using my phone. From the small hours of the morning, while I sleep (sometimes), at work, on lunch, while driving, while waiting in line at the grocery store, outside of the club or bar, inside the library, at the airport, while shopping, and the list goes on and on and on... Most of the time, my eyes are on that tiny little screen. It's my own little world filled with information, communication and access. Hell! I even plan my week on my phone! So much that all areas of my life involve the use of my darling Sebastian.

Everyday I walk around with my head down and my eyes fixed on my mobile. I'm hooked. I'm addicted. I'm definitely going to go through withdrawals if I lost my phone. I must admit, I let that piece of technology get the better out of me. With my head down, I am not able to see much of the world around me, the people that surround me, and the little details of the day that I should be immersing myself in. I am constantly multitasking and I am not helping myself slow down in any way at all. As a result, I feel more and more disconnected from my universe in the face of access and connection. It's like I'm there but my brain really is busy doing something else. The overall quality of my life is greatly affected in a not-so-nice way.

I made up my mind to slow down and cure this huge imbalance and disconnect while en route home. I let the top drop so I could enjoy the breeze that the remaining days of summer has to offer. I drove slowly for a change, savoring the wind in my hair, looking up at the stars and the moon in between stoplights. I realized I've been missing out on so much of what's in front of me. I am faced with the fact that I've become blind to the obvious.

I am tired, but I have a life that needs to get attended to. With a little change in my step, I plan to inhabit my house, peel off the plastic covers off my brand new cookbooks, use my pretty dishes, and play the Wii games that I bought but I never seem to have time to indulge in.

Starting tonight, Sebastian sleeps soundly in the kitchen.